What are the 5 Most Important Things in a Relationship?

Health professional, published author, and registered marriage celebrant - Dr Jonathan Toussaint
October 30, 2017 Romantic Relationships

What are the 5 Most Important Things in a Relationship? -

Fairy tales teach children about romantic love. The princess is in danger, the prince comes to the rescue, and they live happily ever after.

But as you grow up, you realise that love is not as simple as saving the person dear to you from her stepmother, an apple, or a curse. Love involves a lot of trial and error, meeting halfway, and swallowing one’s pride. Everything is complicated.

It all starts when two people share mutual feelings of love and enter a relationship. This is when it is sweetest, when it is new. As years pass, a relationship may get shaken by many problems and sadly end. But this won’t happen when both of you are committed to making your relationship work. It always takes two to tango, right?

Best things to have in a relationship

Just like any venture, a healthy, loving relationship has to have these essential ingredients.

1. Self-love

You are made out of an act of love: when your parents agreed to make you, and right up until today, you are loved. Since all the people around you love you, you learned to love yourself like the way they do. This self-love is one of the most important things in a relationship. Without loving yourself first, how can you share your love with another person?

Self-love entails being kind and forgiving to yourself. Contrary to the usual, you should not give up everything for your partner. Save some for yourself. Also, let go of the excess baggage. Forgive yourself from any wrongdoing in the past. Because surely, a relationship lasts when both parties love their selves first.

2. Respect

This is always the name of the game. Without respect, cheating and other ugly things come in. Just like in basketball, if players do not respect everything about the sport, they play dirty to win. While committing to a relationship is no game, same thing applies. If you do not respect your partner, you have cheating tendencies, plus all things ugly.

But if you respect a person, acceptance always follows. Immature relationships say, “Be this. Do that.” Mature relationships say, “Who do you want to be? What do you want to do?” You understand that this person is an individual, who has their own preferences on music, fashion, politics, sex, or religion. Respecting and then accepting is loving.

happy couple secrets

3. Trust

Any relationship built on lust will only be shattered easily. Try this thing called trust instead. When you trust the person you love, things will be much easier. No unnecessary arguments, over thinking sessions, or unreasonable suspicions. Isn’t that wonderful?

Trust also shows that you really know your partner well. For instance, you can live miles away from each other and trust that honesty and love will prevail. Do not even try keeping a secret, except for surprises of course. Secrets will only harm the relationship and break the trust. Once trust is broken, be ready to say goodbye.

4. Openness

Be open in terms of communication and thinking. Always talk things over in person, never just through social media. When you talk, communicate. Do not just hear your partner out, really listen. During communication, open up everything in your head. Undiscussed matters sometimes cause the break up.

When you analyse happenings in your relationship, be open-minded. Whether it is about where to celebrate your anniversary, what your partner said last night, or when to let go of issues, think freely but critically. Just don’t overdo it.

5. Passion

Love is of course an important thing in a relationship. But simply loving is not enough. You have to love passionately. When you do, things will fall into its proper places. That is, you won’t get tired of constantly going through challenges and making sacrifices together – because you are passionate with the love you have for your partner.

While passionate love is said to be fire that can easily die in a year or two, everything depends on your choices as a couple. Choose to love passionately by turning a flaming fire into a slow burning one. That lasts a lifetime.

Relationships: slowly but surely

Relationships are never easy. Yet if both of you stay the course, so will your relationship. There are a lot of important things, but here are five of the most important.

  • Always love yourself and know that you are enough.
  • Never lose your individuality even though you are with someone you call your better half.
  • Trust is as fragile as it sounds, so give it only to those who deserve it.
  • Be open and smart at the same time, and finally
  • Love passionately.

No one has ever gone wrong with these five. Go ahead, experience it yourself!

Contact Us

  • This field is for validation purposes and should be left unchanged.